What Happened?

I remember when 8:30pm was so early and seeing the sun rise was something I'd seen only a few times.

Now I have dinner by 6:00 and am in bed by 9:00 at the latest. I see the sun rise every day and can't figure out why I'm the only one shopping for groceries at 7:30 in the morning.

How old am I anyway?

I live with a double chinned dude that has male pattern balding and some unexplainable rash. No, not my husband but my 2 month old.

Did I mention the aches and pains. . . .

And one last thing. I think my hearing is failing me, I hear the word "mum" about 30,000 times a day. No human being would be physically able to say mum that many times. And no sane "Mum" could hear her name that many times and stay normal.