Drama at the Pizza Joint

AJ and I were at a pizza place tonight chowing on our pizza when this loud family took the booth behind me. AJ was facing them so I didn't see all the action but I heard it pretty clearly. The mom spoke really rapidly so I will refer to her as "Speedy". Speedy and her family were joined by another family whose mom I will refer to as "Blondie". Each family had 2 kids and all were similar in ages. When Blondie arrived she started jumping up and down squealing and leaped into Speedy's hubby's arms and stayed there for what seemed like a really long time. Speedy got noticeably pissy with this probably because Blondie wouldn't let go of her man.

So then they all sat down at the same booth, it was one of those circular corner booths, and the kids started jumping up and down and tackling each other while the parents were trying to talk. It was so obnoxious. Lucas sat there staring at them with this "I didn't know we could do that" expression on his face. AJ leaned over to Lucas and explained that jumping on the seats is a no-no and that he was being a good boy because he was sitting quietly and eating. So then Lucas began pointing at the kids and yelling NO-NO! NO-NO! Why don't toddlers have a volume control?

So Speedy I'm guessing was still worked up about the inappropriately long hug and embrace because she started barking at Blondie's kids to settle down. Blondie quipped to Speedy that her kids weren't the only ones jumping around and that all the kids needed to behave. Now I don't think these women knew each other very well because when they first arrived they had to be reminded of the children's names. They all were talking about High School so I am guessing this was some sort of a reunion. As we got up to leave I turned and saw Blondie reaching across her HUSBAND to hold onto the arm of Speedy's hubby. HYSTERICAL. And as I was leaving the two young gals sitting across from us were discussing some dude and how he was a nice piece of A$$ but not the best. Juicy.

We live such a vanilla life compared to most people. It really blows me away how much drama some people create and live with.

My neighbors. . . again

What is it about me having bad luck with weird neighbors? Let me set the scene:

Upstairs live no fewer than 4 college age "men?" who are apparently very big sports fans based upon the equipment they haul in and out of their apartment. Yes this is the same group of neighbors that "minute man" is among. Who ever he is, I still don't know who he is but based upon his identical repeat performances he is a slow learner.. .anyway I digress.

These guys are very noisy people they bang and yell and jump and run and drop things ALL THE TIME. I think if I wanted to place a curse on someone I would put these guys above them in an apartment. These guys appear as hyper-masculine guys-guys. You know the type? These guys (according to the one guy I spoke with) get on airplanes and fly to cowboys football games. They are obviously members of some college football team and frequently play basketball and various other sports. They go EVERYWHERE together. I never ever see just one of them, they are like pre-pubescent girls who travel in packs. Got it? Can you picture this?

Ever since we moved in I have noticed occasions where they make strange noises. I really don't know how else to describe it: It sounds like a wrestling match. No seriously, a very rambunctious wrestling match. And it ONLY happens when there are two of them home. If the whole group is home then the wrestling doesn't happen. I've begun referring to this as homoerotic wrestling. Today we watched two dudes walk in the apartment together and I swear to you that the door barely closed before the wrestling began. We could hear them grunting and groaning and thumping and all sorts of stuff. So I told AJ that there is some healthy college "experimentation" going on upstairs. He laughed really hard and said that the walls upstairs were probably blushing. HA HA. Good times.

Bladder Testing

Lucas had his bladder test which was fairly uneventful. According to me who sat in the hallway with Nick while AJ and Lucas were in the room. AJ's account is somewhat more dramatic. I guess he was afraid that it was going to hurt like the blood draw hurt so he screamed for most of the procedure. Thank God I couldn't hear it. But it is over and we should hear about results on Friday at the earliest.

I did meet a nice Mom in the waiting room who's 7 month old was there for a CT scan. I guess his head was measuring larger than normal. They were checking it out to be sure there wasn't water on the brain? But it sounded really scary. When she told me all I could think to say was "better safe than sorry, it's good you are getting it checked." How lame is that? I hate that I never know what to say to people about stuff like that. I felt like I needed to try to minimize it for her because she was clearly terrified, she'd probably been living the worst-case-scenario in her mind.

I was struck by how many really really REALLY sick people were in Radiology. I know, I know, it is a hospital after all. There was this man about the same age as my Dad who was clearly very ill. He was wheeled in the waiting area by his wife and son (who was my age). His eyes were so lifeless and tired. I felt so bad for him. Nick was talking very loudly to his hands and making yodeling noises and the sick man would look up and chuckle at Nick which made me feel a bit better - at least Nick was entertaining!

Have a good Turkey Day!!!

Loco

I had a light bulb go on today.

I am responsible for my parents being crazy.

You know how we all think our parents are missing some of their sanity from time to time? Well I now know that my sister and I are the ones responsible and that we should give them a break (and a lot of hugs too). I have come to this conclusion because MY KIDS ARE DRIVING ME NUTS. Pre-children I would have never eaten an entire plate of chicken salad in 5 minutes flat, including the soda. Chewing food is a luxury. Nor would I have carefully examined a diaper of poop and not blink an eye. Oh - and accidentally leaving a nipple hanging out of my bra? Would have never happened pre-kids. And about this nipple thing, you WOULD THINK that AJ would notice my shirt was looking a little funny and maybe ummm I don't know - SAY SOMETHING to me but he is just as crazy as I am. He probably thought it was some new fashion trend.

so. My crazy parents are camping out in the middle of nowhere somewhere near the Mexico border where the drug cartels are routinely beheading people. They are in a fifth wheel enjoying the solitude of the desert. Little do they know that drug runners are probably creeping past their trailer at night. Crazy? Hell yeah that's crazy. But they are probably still seeking quiet from all the years of my sister and I fighting with each other, so ultimately we drove them to crazy.

And Dear God what was I thinking having TWO kids this close together? What a ton of work and do they thank me? Yeah - actually they do in their own little ways. They are slowly becoming friends which reminds me that having them this close together was a GREAT idea. Soon I'll be able to send them both into the backyard to play and they will have the same interests and abilities. And I will be able to read an ENTIRE article from the newspaper. My Dear Crazy Mom said that the first year with both kids would be the hardest and then it gets easier because they entertain each other. I'm half way there people. HALF WAY. I don't know why I am yelling so much. It is true though - Lucas is trying to play with Nick and Nick is clearly in love with his fascinating brother. Next come the fights and then I will further erode my grip on reality. Soon I will be headed to Darfur for some peace and quiet. . .

Now I am off to get one of those big slobbery open-mouthed kisses that only a 6 month old can give.

Gas

Nooooo, not that kind of gas, but fuel type gas. It is cheap!! $1.77/gal. Yeah baby that's right. CHEAP. So that means I can run out and buy that Ford Expedition I've been eyeing on the lot. Too bad I'm all soured on Ford since the CEO refused to reduce or eliminate his salary from 9 point something MILLION a year. With dudes like that at the helm of these automakers it's no wonder they lacked all foresight and reason and completely failed to plan for the day that monster "air-haulers" would cease to rule the road. No wonder. And now "we" are contemplating lending them money. Hmmm. Here's how the conversation would go if they were to knock on my door and ask me - Miss Taxpayer - for money:

Them: Hello ma'am. We were wondering if you would lend us billions of dollars because we have been blindsided with the shift in market demand within the last 6 years. We swear we will use your money in the best possible way. And we swear that this time we will not jeopardize millions of peoples livelihood's by our crappy decision making. You have our word.

Me: Ummmm. No. (door slams)

Ewwww Boogers Ewwww

Snot is flying around this house like I would never have imagined. I can't believe that a human being as small as Nick could produce the amount of mucous and ewey gooey nastiness that he is producing. With every sneeze I now must reach for the kleenex and rush to wipe the goo away before their little hands try to do so. If they get to the snot before I do then the cleanup gets complicated. As it is Lucas goes running through the house trying to escape the dreaded kleenex that I am holding while in hot pursuit. What is so horrible about kleenex anyway? I really can't figure out what the big deal is.

You know those snotty nosed kids who run around the playground . . . the ones I swore my kids wouldn't be like? Only a terrible mother would let her kid run around with snot everywhere. Yeah. That's my kid. You'll know him because he's the one who climbs the equipment to get away from my reach, so I can't wipe the snot. I eventually give up and let the snot flow freely. Don't worry about him contaminating the equipment because he is one of many snotty nosed kids on that equipment daily. In fact - that is probably where he acquired the snotty nose to begin with.

It just gets better

On Tuesday, the day after my crisis with the wallet, we were summoned to the hospital by our pediatrician to discuss the results of Lucas's ultrasound on his renal system. On the ultrasound it appeared that he has a "duplicated collection system" on his left kidney. Meaning that he may have two ureters. "Not horribly unusual" as the doctor put it. However when I asked this PROFESSOR OF PEDIATRICS AT UNM if she had ever seen one she replied "no". This would potentially explain the bladder infection. So urine was collected and blood was drawn (a horrible experience in itself) and the results said that he is just fine. His kidneys are functioning well according to the blood. His urine revealed that he had . . no infection. WHOO HOO. Now he goes onto a long term antibiotic to keep any more infections from occurring which could cause kidney damage if undetected. And in a two year old they are had to detect, especially if your two year old has a speech delay.

And so we have made the agonizing decision to stop house hunting and begin saving money like crazy in case BOTH of our kids need surgeries this coming year. After dealing with AJ's surgery, when we had tons of disposable income in our wild and exciting pre-child days (remember those?), we know that this could end up being 10's of thousands of dollars.

Before we get the pity party started please keep in mind that the kids sitting next to Lucas in the waiting room were kids who were REALLY sick. One little boy didn't have any hair probably because he was undergoing treatment for cancer. His parents understandably looked like shit. Another little baby in the room had a deformed skull. SO. Let's keep this in perspective. That is what got me through the 3 years of AJ's injury. At least this isn't life threatening. And also we don't even know for sure that there is a problem, just the possibility. We go on Wednesday for more testing where they are going to draw more blood and then put a catheter up him so they can fill his bladder with a dye. Then they take a bunch of pictures and watch where the dye goes when he urinates.

That's it for now, we are off to the aquarium today if everyone's sniffles have improved.

Oh and I don't know why but this computer won't let me link a word in the text to a website so you just have to look at all of this uglyness:

http://www.healthatoz.com/healthatoz/Atoz/common/standard/transform.jsp?requestURI=/healthatoz/Atoz/ency/congenital_ureter_anomalies.jsp

Where's my Wallet?

I lost my wallet. As you can imagine I am not pleased. It is amazing how much of your life you carry with you everywhere you go - in your wallet, and you don't realize it until it is gone and most probably in someone elses' unsavory hands. Here is a small list, not a complete list, of what some slime ball now knows about me:

• Several family photos - with closeups of the kids
• Medical cards and ID numbers for the whole family-My kid's birth dates and names were on a medical card
• AAA tow card
• My drivers license number and former address
• Yearlong free pass to the zoo
• Credit cards (2 cards total-I know it's wild)
• My debit card
• My checking account number
• A home depot gift card
• A prescription written for me - so now they know who my Dr is
• Receipts that I needed
• An abnormally large amount of cash because I had JUST visited the bank (enough cash to cover all of our Christmas gifts)
• Our pediatricians name and number
• Hotel discount cards

Sucks huh? I think in the future I will be more cautious about what information I carry with me. But how do you avoid carrying most of this info with you? You can't. Now I have put fraud alerts on my info. . . because 'tis the season for identity theft and with the economy in its current state the credit card lady kindly informed me that identity theft is at an all-time high this year and expected to get worse.

Oh- and the sellers of house number 2 turned our offer down, they didn't even counter offer. They told our agent that they weren't willing to sell the house for less than what they had listed it for. I KNOW!!! Crazy. Especially in this market. So, on to the next house. I am so tired of looking at homes, I can't even tell you. I think I have seen close to 30 homes. All I want is to be in a house by Christmas and it isn't looking good. You would think with the flood of homes on the market and the low prices I would have found one by now. But you would be wrong.

Wrong, wrong wrong.

Making an Offer

Alright here is the situation.

I should preface this with the following: I have had an ENORMOUS and yummy margarita to relax from the stress of all of this so if my explanations and descriptions are not clear you will now know why.

There are two houses in the same neighborhood, an area we really like. Both homes are the EXACT same floor plan. They are mirror images of each other as far as floor plans go.

House #1: Located at top of a hill with a very secluded and serene back yard which is beautifully landscaped. The interior is BEAUTIFUL with acceptable appliances in the kitchen and tile and hardwood floors through out. The color of paint on the walls is great and probably wouldn't require us to repaint. The windows have not been upgraded to dual pane, the water heater, roof, and heating/cooling have not been upgraded. The neighbor house is for sale and is not in good condition (the neighbor house's condition is abnormal for the area). The front of the house is south facing.

House #2: Not located at the top of a hill but with an huge back yard that is not landscaped except for some collapsing terraces at the rear of the property. Barking dogs are located on both sides of the yard in the neighbor's yards. The back yard has a large shade tree and is a blank slate. The front yard has new rock work and is also a blank slate. There is RV parking for our families to visit. The interior has been hastily updated to appeal to buyers - this house has been sitting on the market for a while. It has new dual pane windows, new water heater, new roof, new carpet, new kitchen cabinets, new kitchen counter tops, new showers and toilets. The interior would require new flooring because the carpet they installed is crap. It would also require new kitchen appliances and a new heating/cooling system. The front of this house faces east.

House number 2 is less expensive than house number one. House number one is listed about 15 thousand above our maximum budget. House number two is within our price range.

So what to do, what to do? We have decided to make an offer on house number two. We believe that with a little sweat equity we can make house number two feel just as cozy as house number one felt. The things that we can not change about house number two, (the barking dogs, position on the lot facing east, no real view) are not huge deals for us. The barking dog factor and lack of backyard seclusion can be fixed by adding height to the cinder block wall surrounding the yard. The dogs are muffled and not looking over the fence at us and we get more privacy. The rest of the things we loved about house number 1 are all cosmetic things - things we can do ourselves. For example I loved the hard wood floor in house number 1 but I thought it was a little too dark but I would never rip it out if we were to live there. But in house number 2 I would be able to put in the exact color/type of flooring I want and I won't feel bad ripping out the crappy new carpet.

So there you have it. House number 2. Hopefully they accept or counter offer and are reasonable sellers. I'll let you know how this all turns out. And sorry it I rambled on and on but it was helpful to type it all out. It somehow made me think of this a little more logically. Or maybe that is the margarita. . .

I think we might have a winner. . .

I think that we have finally found a house and neighborhood that fits us. We saw it this morning and are going back this evening to check it out again. If we like it we will put in an offer this week. Very exciting. I'll keep ya posted.

House hunting

I went house hunting today.

That's it. No news.

Except that people who are trying to sell their house are sometimes really weird. This one lady refused to show her house until tomorrow afternoon when her son wouldn't be sleeping. In this market who in their right mind would make it hard for buyers to see their home? Another home had a strong "dead-animal" stench coming from the garage. We promptly left that house before some dude with a hockey mask and chainsaw came after us.

I did see one house that I really liked. The family trying to sell it did everything right. The place was tidy and CLEAN. The toilet lids were closed and the beds were made, dishes done and *gasp* it even smelled good in there. She put something yummy smelling in the oven and it was awesome. It had a ton of RV parking for family and the yard and house were very roomy. The only problem was that the neighborhood was not very desirable. I mean, it wasn't the ghetto but people weren't keeping up with yard work and repairs in the neighborhood like you would want to see. It was too bad because I could have really been happy with that house.

Later in the day we went looking at new construction which I hated. I hated all of it. There is something about established neighborhoods with larger lots, established landscaping, unique homes and better construction techniques that draws me. Call me crazy but I really don't want to live in a neighborhood with a HOA and pay dues every month so that people can tell me that I didn't get my garbage can in on time. And these homes are built so fast and they are SOOOOOO close to each other. This one lady trying to sell me a new home was raving about how this bedroom had a huge window in the walk-in closet. I thought she was nuts. Who wants a window in their closet? Your clothes will fade. The cookie cutter neighborhoods that these developers have carved into the pristine desert just don't really suit us.

So tomorrow we are seeing more homes. Hopefully tomorrow I find "the one". This must feel similar to speed dating.

Sleep, mysterious sleep

I have created this unlivable sleep situation with Nick and am having a hell of a time getting him out of it. The kid can't go to sleep without me and can't stay asleep without me and I don't have the ability to stick with the cry-it-out method. We successfully did the cry it out with Lucas and it worked because Lucas responded to it quickly and I wasn't forced to endure hours of my infant crying. But Nick is more stubborn and when we tried the cry it out with him he SCREAMED for an hour (we went in to comfort him frequently like Dr. Ferber said to do in his book) and still showed no signs of sleep even though we initially laid him down exhausted. We've tried this several times and I always end up cuddling him after what feels like an endless bout of infant hysteria. My mommy nerves can't handle my baby crying like that. They just can't . . . now I'm crying just thinking about it.

So tomorrow I am going to the book store to buy yet another sleep book for babies. I have the Ferber one and like I said it worked great on Lucas. But I really need to start getting some sleep. I think 6 months of 2-3 hour stretches of sleep is enough - I'm ready for 4-5 hour stretches or *gasp* maybe even 6!!!

Lucas has his sonogram for his renal system on Friday. Hopefully they don't find any reason for the Urinary Tract Infection and conclude that it was a freak thing and there isn't an anatomical reason. Nick goes to the pediatric urologist in March (that is as early as they can see him) to determine if his hypospadias (http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/hypospadias/DS00884) will need surgery. Oh - didn't I mention that? Yeah well we just noticed that the darned thing was in the wrong place about 2 months ago. It isn't horribly obvious but now that he is older and - ahem - things are larger, we can tell that he needs to be evaluated. By the way if you type in hypospadias into wiki you get a nice uncomfortably large picture of one. I was going to post the link but decided it was too icky. Ha ha. You can't help yourself, you are going to do it aren't you?

Tootles.

My Strange Husband

Tonight AJ was taking Nick's sweatshirt off of him to get him ready for bed. He came into the bathroom where I was giving Lucas a bath and announced "Hey look at Nick's African Puppy-eared Headdress!"

He was so proud himself. I thought the look on poor Nick's face was great. Poor little dude was stuck with a sweatshirt on top of his head that his father was pretending was an African Headdress that resembled puppy ears.

I mean. . . LOOK at Nick's expression. He is like WHAT THE F***???

A Day at Bandelier

Nick was laughing so hard when AJ took this picture - don't know why.

Lucas rode on AJ's shoulders for the steep parts (so he wouldn't run and jump off a cliff).

Family photo number one.

Family photo number two.

AJ reassuring Lucas after he fell for the third time.

Lucas must have run half of the trail. He had so much energy and he was laughing the whole time.



Trying to keep Lucas on the trail . . .

A flash of Carlsbad

Can it get any worse than this?

I was sitting at a stop light yesterday and looked to my left and saw a child about 3 years old sitting in a booster seat in the front passenger seat of a minivan. (He's supposed to be in the back seat for those who don't know.) I then noticed that he was not strapped into his booster seat. Then I saw that he was very obese and eating a happy meal. And finally his presumed Mommy, the driver, whipped out a ciggy and lit that baby up. Oh - and the windows were rolled up. Isn't that fabulous? I thought I was in Carlsbad again.

Sometimes I beat myself up for not being a good enough Mommy, but I will never be that bad. I guess it helps to see truly bad Mommies because it reminds me that just because I let Lucas watch Blue's Clues all afternoon doesn't mean I am bad at my "job". That lady I saw at the stop light - now she was BAD at her job.

Eat Eat!!!

Picture it:

Lucas in the shopping cart seat facing me.

Nick in the basket with his car seat surrounded by groceries.

Lucas playing with his two new 88 cent dinosaurs.

Me standing in the produce department directly in front of the cart.

Lucas interrupting my conversation with a nice stranger to hold his dinosaur's mouth up to my boob yelling "Eat! Eat!!"

Yeah.

The Boys

Hey Everybody!!

Wearing a towel like Momma does.

Pretending to call Daddy.

Miss Haylee sleeping with Nick. She is keeping his feet warm since he kicks off his socks.

YUCKY

Have you ever had a baby throw up on you? I am here to let you know that it is really gross. The worst part is that it ended up in my hair and on my face and on my shirt . . . pretty much everywhere. I survived the experience only because it was my own childs vomit. Had it been anyone elses I would have thrown up as well.

Lucas isn't feeling well either. I fed him oatmeal tonight because he clamped his mouth shut and refused to eat anything else. Oatmeal it is then.

I sure hope the sickness isn't because I allowed the kids to be outside for an hour in the freezing cold and wind. . . DON'T JUDGE. . . they were bundled up. They stayed warm.

And one last thing. I am going to kill my darling little kitty cat if she raids the garbage can ONE MORE TIME. Anytime I leave the room for any length of time I return to find garbage and food remnants scattered through the kitchen/dining area. So that explains why her coat is so silky soft and her formerly lean frame is now very curvy.

A New President

I am too happy for words. Finally a politician that has my full confidence and support. I am so relieved. That acceptance speech was amazing. And I am so happy that Michele is going to be first lady. I think she is so graceful and intelligent.

Blabbing about my day

AJ went to Denver again this morning and before he left he explained to Lucas that he would be gone for a while and that he wouldn't be able to read to him before bedtime at night until he got back. He explained that Mommy would read to him and Daddy would call and talk to him on the phone every night. Well Lucas started to cry and get upset because he didn't want Daddy to go on a trip. So as I was watching AJ's and Lucas's hearts break I opened my mouth (trying to make it better for everyone) and declared that we were going to the zoo today - after Daddy went to work. And it worked. Everyone was happy.

We had a great time. We got there early, like 20 minutes after they opened, and saw all the animals eating their breakfasts. In some enclosures the keepers were still cleaning and prepping so we got to talk to them and asked them lots of questions. I go there so frequently that they are going to get sick of me interrupting their work. But we learned that the gorilla female that looks preggers in not. She is just fat. Very very fat. I guess the silverback there at the zoo likes his women large and won't mate with them unless they are fat. So the fat one is the alpha female, because she is the favored girl. I didn't take pictures because the gorillas seemed to be upset that I was there at all - disturbing their serene morning by walking by. And they are so human-like that I tried to respect what little privacy they are allowed. Same with the chimps.

While I was talking to the Chimp keeper the males kept running up to the glass and hitting it really hard. Right in front of us. The keeper didn't even flinch. I asked her what the deal was and she explained that the two "boys" hitting the glass were in puberty and were just being bullies. They think they are big men now and are charging everything in sight. I guess the female chimps get sick of the "boys" and run over to the alpha male to assist them in keeping the boys in line. They grab the alpha male by the wrist and drag him out to deal with the "boys". He apparently prefers to stay out of the day-to-day squabbles of the group and is a reluctant participant. He only gets involved when things are getting out of hand. Funny.

The zebra keeper said that zebras are nothing like horses temperamentally. Something I suspected but I had to ask for confirmation. He said they are super flighty and keepers can't get too close to them or they freak out. Which makes sense when you consider the habitat/conditions/predators they are adapted to living with. I guess that they can't put them in squeeze shoots but instead they have to dart them to do any work on their feet or any veterinary care.

The tigers were fighting with each other when we went by. Both males had their ears laid back and the scruffs of their necks puffed up. One male started sharpening his claws as we watched him. He stretched out and when he did I realized just how HUGE these animals are. He was so big and so long. It is amazing.

The rinos were fighting as well. The two girls (who were really healthy, robust gals) were pissed that the male rino was trying to shove them away from their food. So both girls went to another pile of feed. When the boy tried to approach the girls turned toward him in unison and ran after him - they shoved him out of the way with the length of their horns. He was all pissed off and started shoving back but was no match for the enormous women. So he gave up and went back to his pile of feed. They were all snorting at each other and making noises. It was pretty cool.

And the Sea Lions were really active. One came and floated right up against our window - all the other families at the other windows were jealous and tried to come shove us out of the way - but we hung onto our window. Screw their kids . . . I want my kid to see the sea lion first! And the sea lion just sat there floating around right next to where my hand was on the window making scratching motions - as if he were a cat. And it worked. He stuck his head right down by my hand as if he wanted to be scratched . . . I mean who wouldn't want a scratch? I would. This lasted for like 3 or 4 minutes. This sea lion just kept rolling around and pushing his "little" body against our window saying hello. They seem like really sweet animals.

I had two separate moms (with husbands in tow), both with kids around the same age as my kids, stop me and comment on how it was remarkable that I was brave enough to take BOTH of my kids to the zoo ALL ALONE!!! Hmmm. I think I would go insane if I couldn't take the kids anywhere alone.

Here are pictures