Grease Ball Wife

Today AJ left town for the week.  He's about three hours away - so not too far. 

After he left I got started on the monumental task of reassembling two Britax car seats after I'd washed the covers.  It was epic.  Lucas's seat is a beast and is far more complicated than Nick's seat.

There were straps and holes, and metal bars, and velcro, and more straps, and some more holes and all sorts of knobs, and tethers and adjustments and different ways to thread the straps based on the weight of the child and several teeny tiny diagrams demonstrating how to do all of this. . . .

Epic.

We lost the bar that goes in the back of Lucas's seat.  He'd been playing with it yesterday while I cleaned the car out.  I didn't think anything of it until I needed it this morning to reinstall the seat.

ME: "Lucas what did you do with the black metal bar from your car seat?"
Lucas (looking at the garage door motor on the ceiling of the garage):  "I put it up there Mom.  See?  It's up on the roof."
Me:"No, Lucas, for real.  What did you do with it?"
Lucas: "I dunno." 
Me: "Lucas we have to find it or we can't go anywhere all week."
Lucas: "Oh. Ok."  (Looks as ceiling again) "THERE IT IS, IT'S UP THERE."
Me: "Go to the playroom.  Mommy needs alone time."

I was about to scream.  It took me three hours and one tearful phone call to a sympathetic friend to locate the damn thing at the bottom of a box. 

At 12:30 AJ called and said "Babe, I forgot my wallet on top of the dresser, I have no money and no gas." 

So I loaded the kids into the newly fixed car (!!! finally!!!).  The paint on the hood is peeling and looking really terrible but hey. . . . it runs good, gets good gas mileage, and it's paid for.

We drove two hours up to see AJ where he met us and I had the opportunity to meet one of his bosses.  Yayyy!  I had heard a lot about her and it was all good, so I was happy to finally meet her. 

BUT.

I hadn't showered.  And I hadn't brushed my hair.  And I had raspberry jam smeared across my sweatshirt from a peanut butter and jelly incident at lunch with Nick.  And my armpits stunk from the WWE wrestling match with the car seats . . . and the lack of shower.  And, I later discovered, I had mascara from yesterday smeared under one eye. 

Of course when AJ called I rushed out the door - not thinking I'd meet his boss - and several coworkers he always talks about.  I'd just finished manhandling 200 lb car seats into place - which as most of you know - is a gargantuan task.

So, to sum up:  I was smokin' hot. 

AJ was kind and introduced his grease-ball wife to his boss and other people. . . and they were kind and made small talk.  They didn't mention my hair was balled together in a knot that I had tried to hide in a ponytail -which really looked like a rats nest. 

He must have been so proud of me pimpin up in the car without paint on the hood and then getting out and looking like I'd slept under a bridge.   Mighty, mighty proud.