Come on Over Anytime!

(Note: We live in a neighborhood where the houses are packed together and we have cinder block fencing that carries sound up and out of your yard so that people several houses away can hear your backyard activities.)

All summer long we could hear them. They had parties on their back patio and we could hear them outside when it was warm out. They seem to really enjoy life and getting to know their neighbors. When the sweet smell of BBQ would waft into our bedroom window at night and we always knew they were outside, enjoying life. It didn't bother me at all. I thought it was nice that people were enjoying their yard and getting some fresh air. AJ and I enjoy sitting on the patio and being outside and can relate.

Then I heard the gossip. Swingers. A couple of neighbors several houses down claimed to have partied with them and said that once the alcohol got flowing and people relaxed things. . .happened. And some of the gossip had some rather sinister undertones that I won't repeat here. That's just what the neighbors said anyway. I can't verify the gossip one way or the other.

BUT. I can tell you this: The dude stopped to talk yesterday while I was examining my trees for possible pruning. He is creepy. I was staying objective because I don't give a damn what they do in the privacy of their own home. I don't care one way or the other. But he was indeed creepy. He is an old hippie who clearly tripped his way through Woodstock. He started asking odd questions. Am I married? Is my husband a big dude? Do I party?

So during this encounter I have shoved the horrible gossip to the back of my brain and deliberately turned off the part of my brain screaming "CREEPPPPYYYY!!!" because I was hell-bent on trying to be objective and give the dude the benefit of the doubt. Oh and did I mention that I'm stupidly naive and deserve a swift kick in the ass? When he asked me if we party, I told him I like to party every now and again (ie; yes). Immediately after the words left my mouth I realized what he meant by the question. He didn't want to know if we partied. He wanted to know if we partied. He got a big old creepy grin on his face and said "Niiicce".

I.

SAID.

YES!!!!!

Oh dear GOD what have I done? What trouble has my big blabber-y mouth gotten me into now?

Then he says "If you ever need anything just come on down and let yourself in the back door!" he told me. No joke. That is what HE SAID.

I must have turned bright red and then I fumbled to tell him that NO I couldn't possibly let myself in unannounced and then I said some lame ass thing about knowing how to use a doorbell.

I excused myself and went in to check on Lucas who was napping.

And truly? Are swingers even around any more? Is that something people actually do?? I thought this was something that died out in the early eighties when Cocaine came into popularity and LSD use was simmering down.

Anyway. I was approached by a Swinger. And I said yes - sort of. Ahhhh shit.


P.S. I haven't even warned AJ about my encounter yet. I know he'll make fun of me and I'm just not ready for that.