Since It's Just Between Us Now

I thought I'd share a really super embarrassing story from today's adventures. 

We purchased a Groupon for a membership to the Santa Fe Children's Museum and today we went up there to turn it in and claim our membership!!  Whoo Hoo.  I love that place.

On the way into town we stopped at The Sunflower Market for some lunch supplies.  I think I may start shopping at this Sunflower instead of the one close to my home.  There was an incident at the one close to my home involving an employee, yogurt samples, and *ahem* body fluid.  It is like a person's worst nightmare right?? 

Please hold while I gag. 

So anyway.  We were at a different one that is in Santa Fe.  I'd forgotten to bring some feminine hygiene products with us so I grabbed a small box on our way through the store (relevant in 2 paragraphs).  We had all sorts of fruit and sandwiches and yogurt covered raisins. . . . I know. . . . it still makes ya shudder a bit. 

Lucas announces that he has to go potty so we go to the store's restroom.  As we entered the restroom an elderly woman was exiting the larger handicapped stall.  I prefer the large stall with the kids in tow.  Lucas covers his nose when we entered the stall (lady was washing her hands) and yells that "It tinks in here Mommy, UUUUGGGHHH, it TINKS SO BAD."   OMG. 

I tell him that it is a bathroom and bathrooms sometimes stink.  Dear Lord I hope she was't as mortified as I was.

Back at the cart - Nick zeros in on my box of  ladies items, and decides that what ever is in the box is for him.  He grabs the box and in lightning speed rips the end open while screaming in his booming voice "BANDAIDS MOMMY, I NEED A BANDAID FOR MY BOO BOO!" 

He's yelling this super f-ing loud in the very quiet store.  Honest to GOD this happened so fast.  I loudly and frantically shush him while trying to snatch the box from him - also while still pushing the cart - because OMG I must get the hell out of here before it gets worse.  I have a sixth sense now for impending disaster and was speeding to the front of the store to pay.   But the little sucker is crazy fast and he swung his arm away from me as I reached for the box and flung tampons all over the floor in the grocery store. 

Lucas announces as I quickly bend down to collect the rolling tampons that "Those are funny bandaids Mommy.  Mommy?  MOMMY?  ARE  YOU LISTENING TO ME?  What are those bandaids for?"  Meanwhile Nick is screeching (and drawing additional attention to us) because I was now in possession of his prized box of bandaids and he was FURIOUS that he didn't have them.  He then attempts to climb out of the dinky shopping cart and nearly tips it over - but I was able to catch the cart WITH a handful of tampons.  Then my sunglasses fell off the top of my head so I bent over again to get the god damned sunglasses, and dropped more tampons.  I was a mess.  The whole situation was a mess. 

YAYY for Mommy multi-tasking powers.

I was mortified.  Too mortified to look around to see how many people witnessed this event.