New Pants Needed

What's that in your pants, there, Kristin? 

 Do you have a big load in your pants?  It's hard to tell because they are so baggy. 

 Those are some serious Mom jeans.  So, all of your pants are like this? Frumpy, saggy and falling down?

 Oh my.  What happened to your butt?  Does it exist?

 Whoa.  There is a lot of extra material there.  It is bunching up  . . . almost as if you have something extra in there.  Not that you do.  It just looks that way.

Time to get some new pants.