This is a picture of Nick hanging onto Lucas's head/hair while he jumps up and down on the ottoman. Just a day in the life, people. A day in the life.


I have been on a dehydrating kick lately. I am currently making all sorts of fruit rollups for the kids. Today it was blackberry/pear/banana rollups. Very good.



We took the boys to their first swim lesson on Saturday morning. Let me start by saying that it took me nearly 40 minutes in the shower to weed-whack my leg hair down to a socially acceptable level. I rarely shave my legs anymore. I am fortunate enough to have very pale, very soft and thin leg hair so shaving, I have decided, is optional for Miss Kristin. Don't get me started on how I think society is unnecessarily pressuring women to shave hair that really doesn't need to be removed. . . . *ahem* hold on while I light a pile of bras on fire. . . . moving on. . . . .

The boys were enrolled in the "tots and parents" class. This is where the parents get into the water with their young children to help them get used to being in water at all. Next comes the tadpoles which is for children who are preschoolers who learn to adjust to being in water with out their parents. They learn to hold their breath and float. There were about 5 different levels of swimmers there and they were all in the same pool. The pool was surrounded by a GAZILLION parents who were watching their little darlings learn to swim.

Except for us parents with tots. We got to parade out in our swim suits with our screaming, clinging "tots" and awkwardly try to keep out "tots" from ripping our swim suits off of our shoulders IN FRONT OF EVERYONE. I was by far the most blindingly white person there. I was also the biggest person who dared to be seen in a swim suit. Giggle Giggle. Yeah. It felt reeeaaaaalllllllll good to have to bend over in front of the packed house of parents in the ankle deep water to pick up my "tot" who was coming un-freakin' glued because he was standing in water. Then little monkey boy tried to rip off my swim suit in a fit to get me to leave the water entirely. Yes he began to actually SPUR me like a god damned bronco. I'm not joking. He had great technique and should really ride large animals for a career.

It took me about 20 minutes to get Nick to be comfortable in the water. I finally was able to get him a kick board to hang onto and I held the kick board with one hand and wrapped my arm around his torso with the other and we motor boated around the pool. He was having a blast. So I handed him in this position off to AJ so I could play with Lucas who was having the time of his life.

AJ decided that Nick, my TWENTY ONE month old child, had mastered the kick board after 5 minutes and let go of the kid so that he could GRAB ONTO HIS ANKLES and show him how to kick. Do you know what happened next? Nick rolled off the kick board and went under water. AJ quickly retrieved my TWENTY ONE month old BABY from under water. Nick sputtered and then started screaming and crying. It was then that the whistle was blown and everyone was done with lessons for the day. Nick's final memory of the pool is a near death experience. So. Next week I get to start all over trying to get Nick accustomed to the water again.

Lucas on the other hand loved the water and had a blast. Except that the pool gradually got deeper and deeper. I hadn't realized this but kids who aren't familiar with pools, or water for that matter, will just keep walking deeper and deeper into the water until they are no longer able to get a breath. It seems kinda strange that a kid wouldn't just turn around and head for higher ground but no - I watched Lucas walk into the deep end and he was quickly rescued by the teacher before he gulped water. I had a fleeting thought of him taking orders at McDonald's for the rest of his life. But then I watched another kid do the same thing so I decided that all kids must inadvertently try to drown themselves if not watched carefully. Good to know.