Yoga for Little People

I helped out at Lucas' preschool today. I really need to get down there and help more but I feel like Nick is a bit in the way. That sounds mean but I don't mean it to be. He takes up the attention that I would need to devote to helping the teacher. I really don't care to leave him unless I have to, and it isn't because I don't have people who I trust and are willing to help me, it is just that Nick has never tolerated separation as well as Lucas has.

Today was a field trip. Two of the "Phono" classes walked from the preschool to Lowes which was maybe 1/4 mile away. There were plenty of parents who arrived to help with this endeavor. It involved walking along a very busy road and the preschool teacher confessed that she'd been up all night worried that not enough parents would arrive to help her safely get the children to Lowes.

When I arrived I walked in to see 7 little preschoolers attempting to hold their yoga poses. And OH. MY. GOD. it was all I could do not to burst out laughing. It was simply the funniest and most adorable thing I have seen in a long time. Some were falling over, others were wobbling, others were doing it with the opposite leg they were supposed to use. I wish I'd had my camera ready to go so I could show you. OH. I almost forgot. They had this tranquil music playing in the background that was supposed to relax them, but instead the teachers were talking over it trying to help individuals regain their poses. SO FUNNY!

Most parents who arrived didn't bring a sibling so they were able to help with not only their own child but another child who's parent was unable to attend. It all worked out well. Every parent had two children, one for each hand to hold as we walked along the road. The teachers were able to help those children who decided their legs couldn't handle the 1/4 mile journey by pulling them in a wagon. Once we got to Lowes we took a tour of the garden section and discussed different trees and different root types, leaf types and soil types. Then we moved on to the carpet cutting station. The kids were treated to a demonstration of their carpet cutting machine. They were all loudly ooohhh-ing and ahhhhh-ing at the magical machine. Next up was the forklift demonstration which was really a very VERY big deal. Then we all walked into a classroom and built various projects. My two boys picked out the ball toss to assemble. It was a lot of fun.

Now for the rest of the story: There was this horrible woman (Mom) who somehow decided that I was her new buddy and started talking loudly to me. This continued for the entire field trip. I tried ditching her, "junior high style" (I'm not above it), but she was no stranger to this tactic and stuck to me like Gorilla glue. She is one of these know-it-all types who can't be told something she doesn't already know. She is loud and her laugh is louder. And she laughs at inappropriate times - like at things that clearly aren't funny. I think she singled me out because I hadn't previously met her and I didn't know to stay the hell away. Everyone else seemed to steer clear as if they'd already seen her in action. She had a child who flipped out at the slightest thing, like me trying to help him take his scarf off. The kid started twitching and squealing and . . . . flipping out. It was all new to me. I just backed away from the erupting volcano and let her deal with her prodigy. But in all fairness, the class is comprised of children with various needs, and her child may have been dealing with more than just a language/speech problem. I don't know. I just knew that child was not happy with me.

It was ALL I COULD DO PEOPLE - ALL I COULD DO not to obnoxiously correct her when she told her child not to touch a plant because "we have oils on our hands that can kill plants, so it is very important not to touch them. They are very delicate and everyone has oil on their hands so nobody should be touching plants." Maybe this is true for delicate plants but this kid touched a very hardy succulent plant, and I know from plenty of experience with this EXACT SAME TYPE OF PLANT in my own home that toddlers and preschoolers simply can not kill this plant through touch. I am so much smarter than this broad. I can beat her down with years of experience and ignorance. :)

Which brings me to another point. I saw wayyyyy too many similarities between this crazy woman and myself. I laugh inappropriately. I am way too loud - all the time. I am a know it all. Sometimes, I think people avoid me so they don't have to try to talk louder than me just to get a word in. Anyway. She was nuts. And judging from an intense bug-eyed picture taken of myself recently, so am I.

Here is the whole class. They are so freaking cute. Lucas is front left in the blue shirt.


The boys working on their projects.


Lucas insisted on having a plant in his room. So every day we set the plant on his window sill so it can get some sunlight. He is so sweet how he loves plants and taking care of them. I wonder if they learned feng shui in preschool too?